Kissing can do all sorts of things to your body. Your blood pressure rises, your breath accelerates, your heart beat goes faster, it lowers stress, burns calories and your brain emits endorphins. But why do we kiss?
The Roman poet Lucretius saw it as an attempt to literally merge.
Swiss psychiatrist Carl Jung had a more basic explanation. According to him kissing originated for the purpose of transferring food, just as with birds.
Sigmund Freud based kissing on sex and a mother-oriented obsession. According to him it was an egocentric tendency to return to the mother's lap.
Albert Einstein was… more
How To Be Thankful
Being thankful in such a "self"-oriented culture can be difficult, but as we (hopefully) move into being conscious adults, we begin to peel back the layers to find what's truly important to us in this world. It's easy to find fault with our current situation; we don't have "enough" money, "enough" love, "enough" power etc. But in comparison to those less fortunate, we often have more than enough. When you find yourself dissatisfied and constantly wanting for things, chances are, the attainment of the "things" you so desire would still not bring you contentment. The funny thing is, when we… more
The 9 Types of Romantic Love
Love is that often-elusive feeling we all want to experience. Art, music, poetry, religion, and most recently science, try to explain and express it; we've all had it, and most of us have lost it at one time or another in our lives. The reason love can be so vastly bi-polar, (one minute tragic, one minute wonderful), is because of the individuality of our personalities combined with the situations we're in. Add to that our past experiences, and we find endless combinations of drama, excitement, hope, despair, fun, fulfillment, joy and sorrow.
A study published in the British Journal… more
How To Get Closure from a Past Relationship
Most of us have been through a tough break-up at some point in our lives. The feelings of despair, hopelessness, sadness and loneliness we experience are often overwhelming, and often seem endless. Usually though, with the help of friends, family, and our undeniable human spirit - we eventually get over our heartbreak. We slowly pick up the pieces, put ourselves back together, and move on, hopefully stronger and wiser in the end. Sometimes however, we can't seem to "get over it". We can't seem to understand how the other person could have left us. We had so much invested in… more
Why Is Finding Love Harder as We Get Older?
No one ever said Dating was easy. Putting yourself "out there" takes a certain amount of courage, and finding that special someone can sometimes be compared to navigating our way through a minefield; we're interacting with people we don't know very well and who don't know us yet, communicating through the less-than-perfect art of body language, trying to be ourselves and retain our dignity while trying to find love, a state which can make us feel vulnerable at best. It's no wonder there are so many singles still searching these days, and things get even tougher as we get older.… more
How Has Your Life Been So Far?
There are times in our lives, usually through crisis or trauma, or as the end of our lives near, when we're forced to confront our mortality and take a hard look at who we are, and who we've been. These life changing events can really show us what's important, what we need to work on and change about ourselves, and they can also clear up any confusion about where we want our future to head. Wouldn't it be great though, to know these things without crisis "showing" us who we are and how we feel about ourselves and life in… more
Dating During a Recession
It's true times are scary right now economically. Many of us have had to make adjustments to our budgets and lifestyles to accommodate the changes in the economy. When there are feelings of uncertainty in our lives, it's a natural response to not want to go through it alone; our desire to date and look for love can be even stronger than usual. But contrary to this emotional desire, our "intellectual" side may be telling us to put our dating life on hold while there's a recession going on. At the end of the day however, wouldn't we all agree… more
Emotional Spring Cleaning
Finally, the first signs of Spring have arrived! And with this warmer weather, comes a sense of new possibilities, fresh starts, and renewed optimism, not only about life in general, but
about our dating life. So how are we doing on our New Year's Resolutions - did we follow through this year? If your resolutions were seemingly a passing fancy, the Springtime is a great time to renew our initial hopes and plans for the coming year. But how prepared are we to take advantage of any positive opportunities that may come our way? Now is a great time… more
What is Your Relationship to Love?
In honour of the upcoming St. Valentine's Day - it might prove worthwhile to take a good look at our own relationship to Love itself. It's something we all seem to crave, it's often not what we expected, and it can take us to the highest of highs and the lowest of lows... Humans are a habitual species. We often formulate an unhealthy view of what we think love should be based on our past experiences. If we're conscious enough however, we realize we need to make a change. Because love is about relating to other people directly, it's in… more
How to Make a New Year's Resolution Stick
New Year's resolutions always seem like such a great idea at the time; our best intentions are put forth to eat less, exercise more, date more and work less, find love, quit smoking, be happier, stress less etc. etc. etc... But by Jan. 2nd these wonderful positive intentions often seem to go out with the Holiday trash. So why do we make New Resolutions we can't keep - and how can we do better to help make them stick?
Why Don't We Keep our New Year's Resolutions?
Let's set the stage for this yearly resolution ritual we often play -… more
We're coming to the end of 2008, and if you find yourself falling into that negative headspace of "STILL" being single, we're here to catch you! We know love is possible, because we're lucky enough to have our clients tell us it happens! The fact that we can even be part of facilitating such a wonderful part of peoples' lives is a real blessing. We thought we'd relay a few amazing stories from around the world about true love, to help you keep the faith and bring a smile to your face - and to let you know that you… more
How Far Did You Get in 2008?
As we approach the end of 2008 amidst all the unavoidable holiday busyness, let's try to take a few moments to ourselves to reflect on the past year, and what it's meant to us. In our fast-paced culture, we tend to skip ahead without looking back, so before we start boldly proclaiming our New Year's resolutions, it's probably a good idea to think about how far we came in terms of our personal growth, and love-life, in 2008.
Questions to Ask Yourself:
1. What did you learn about yourself this past year? Was there anything that surprised you about your… more
Tips for Controlling Holiday Stress - Before it Happens!
Shopping, holiday parties, the obligatory family visits , endless line-ups, over-eating, even more shopping, credit card debt etc... It's no wonder the holidays, a time marketed as "The Season of Giving" and "A Time to Enjoy With Your Family", is probably THE most stressful time of the year. The idea of the holidays is a beautiful thing; it should be a time where we show our appreciation to those around us, and a time to reflect on how blessed we are. However, with the media bombarding us with its overwhelming materialism and our family dynamics being put to the… more
Why Is It So Difficult To Talk About S-E-X?
Sex is something we all think about, it's something most of us participate in (or would like to), and it's everywhere in our culture, reflected in advertising, fashion, music, movies and TV.
When a topic so universally important can be so difficult to talk about, it's no surprise our culture can be confused, leading to everything from sexual dysfunction and deviance to lack of understanding between the sexes. This lack of sexual communication greatly affects our relationships, which in turn affects nearly every facet of society.
How Does It Start and What Can We Do to Fix It?… more
Is Your Fear of Commitment Holding You Back?
Commitment can be a tricky business. The more you learn about what it means as an adult, the scarier it can be - and not without good reason. When we first start dating or first fall in love, our concept of commitment is often not much more than a vague fairytale of happily ever after. Society tells us if we meet the "perfect" person, the rest will take care of itself. Humans learn from trial and error however, and it doesn't take very long to realize that relationships are hard work and commitment isn't to be taken lightly.
Committing to… more
How To Assess Your Relationship
When we first meet someone and experience that "spark" - nothing compares to that feeling of initial excitement. Have you ever noticed though, how it can take over everything and before you know it you wake up wondering, "How did things get like this?" All people have needs, and sometimes the need/want for physical intimacy can cloud our judgement and stop us from truly getting to know the person we're with. When one part of the relationship (like physical intimacy) moves much quicker than other (such as communication skills), we can be setting ourselves up for disappointment. It's important to… more
How To Help Your Friend Through A Breakup
Most of us have been through difficult break-ups. Getting over the ending of a relationship is a process that can't be rushed - we all mourn in our own way in our own time. And while it's one thing to be in the middle of it ourselves, what about when we have to watch a good friend go through the pain and turmoil while we feel helpless on the sidelines? At times you feel bad for them, at times you want them to snap out of it so you can have your fun-loving friend back. It's a real testament to… more
Food - or Aphrodisiac?
The word "aphrodisiac" comes from Greek mythology's goddess of love Aphrodite. The definition of the word is "a substance that arouses sexual desire", and although the scientific world is not convinced as to whether or not there are such things as natural aphrodisiacs, the general population has believed it to be true for centuries. Aphrodisiacs have been used throughout history to help infertility, spice up one's sex life, aid in seduction, and increase potency.
In ancient times, nutrition was very much linked to a person's sex drive because food was not as readily available as it is now. It… more
Is Stress Hurting Your Dating Life?
With the world moving so quickly and everyone trying to fit so much into their lives these days, stress has become a social, physical, and emotional epidemic. We are stressed out by work, finances, family, relationships, health issues - the list goes on and on. We all know intellectually, or we should by now, that in the end all we really want and need out of this world is love. All the other things are physical manifestations of what we think we need, but they only bring us temporary happiness, if any at all.
When we try to date while… more
Pick-up lines, most often used by men to attract the mate of their dreams, can be amusing, scandalous, cute, funny, scary, and even beautiful. One thing to note is that the content of these oft-maligned lines is actually not that important! According to research pioneered in the 1960's by American psychologist Albert Mehrabian, the content of our speech only accounts for 7 percent of human communication! The tone of our voice accounts for a much larger 38 percent while body language accounts for a whopping 55 percent of the impact of our interactions. What should we glean from this? Well,… more